Kardinal healing makes me sad.

Bags make Mike sad, apparently.

Thunderstorms make me sad. Not being a published author makes me sad. Moths make me sad. Hysterical at first, but then sad when they don't leave.

But this is a WAR blog, innit? So, what makes me sad in WAR? Well, inadequacy, mostly. Mostly mine. But not always.

I'm a good healer. It is especially noticeable when I hop on a lower tier alt. T1, of course, is no competition. Most people are still wondering what this or that button does. In T2 you start getting better players all around. No more trials and lots of seasoned players on their alts. You also start getting some bigger guilds there. Still, I can pwn lots in T2 SCs.

T3. Man, if only something happened in T3. They call LotD the T3 killer. Most of the time this is true and you still can't find anything to do, RvR-wise, after midnight (GMT+0). However, for whatever reason, things have been picking up as of late. I actually like T3 quite a lot. You have your real keeps with 2 doors, you have a decent array of abilities, you can separate the wheat from the chaff as far as player quality but you have none of the stress and/or waiting of T4. And when you get to level 31 you're completely unstoppable whether you're healing, killing, whatever. So it is in T3, the tier I love the most, that I get the most sad. Why? Inadequacy. Of others, that is. Tanks not guarding the mdps, mdps hitting on tanks and, of course, the aloof healers.

I've said this a lot already but I say again. For the love of whatever deity you wish to believe in, if you're a healer, don't just walk over another healer's body. Or any body, for that matter. If you see a body and you click it and it doesn't say "Friendly" or if you get a chat bubble cursor on your mouse, then that person is just eagerly awaiting that love spell. The saddest I can ever be is when I go out of my way to res a healer from another party, manage to get both our parties in decent enough shape and then get focus-fired on by a BW/SW/Bomb'syouruncle and die and all the other healers just run right over me while my party slowly but surely dies away.

This doesn't happen in T4. For one, T3 has showed them how annoying it is to have this happen to you. So they rez others hoping that the afore mentioned won't happen to them. Counter-rezing is also common practice. You know what I'm talking about. A healer dies, you rez them and then you die and they rez you and then they die again, rewind, repeat and so on and so forth and such like. I find it amusing and frequently yell "f u, we will not die!"

One thing did make me feel quite sad in T4 yesterday. My own inadequacy. There I was, in my meager Sentinel gear, scraping by on the top of SC lists at around 300k, hoping for a few wins so I could get a focus that isn't LotD talisman dependant. But along comes Kardinal, my new hero WP, healing around 750k per SC. That Kardinal person is probably one of the most proficient healers I've ever seen. We, on the other hand, have these Zealots in full Tyrant and Warlord doing less for the colective than me. I don't get it, it's like they're not even trying. If Kardinal can do it, why can't we?

Which is not to say I don't have my bad days. Especially if I'm alone in the party or in a party full of mdps (they die too fast for me to be able to heal). Or if I happen to die lots in between respawn waves. Shit happens, true. I'm living proof. But shit doesn't happen consistently. I see the same names and they heal consistently the same. I for example, am in the 300k ballpark. Kardinal is up on the 700k stadium. So why do we get awesomely geared healers with apparently enough experience to know better, doing exactly the same I'm doing?

This too, is very disheartening.